We've all encountered it, maybe you even live with one - the one person bird. This is a bird who is overly bonded to one person and either shuns, or outright attacks everyone else. Stereotypes say it's typical of African Greys or Cockatoos or ------- (fill in the blanks), but actually it shouldn't be typical of any species, and you can see it in any bird, if he hasn't been properly socialized and nurtured. It's another problem behavior that we create and inadvertently (or sometimes deliberately) reinforce. Why? Human ego!! We think it's cute when our birdie buddy bites our mate, or chases our mother-in-law around on the floor. We think it proves what a good bird parent we are - that our bird loves us SO much that he only wants to be with us.

Sadly, what happens is you drastically narrow your bird's world when he can't be sociable with other people (or birds), and is dependent only on you. What happens, though, when you're not around? One of the main reasons birds come to my adoption program is because of these "love triangles." When you allow this situation to escalate, often you either get a divorce or give up your bird! You also add stress to your bird's life. He's afraid of the vet, the groomer, the bird sitter - so every exam, wing clip, or boarding trip becomes a major ordeal, creating unnecessary stress for your bird, and you. He doesn't want anyone else to feed him, step him up, or play with him. His world grows ever smaller and smaller.

It starts in the nursery. When I was handfeeding babies, all the birds played together (supervised, of course) on one big playstand, so they learned to interact with one another. The handfeeding was done alternately by two or three of us. I handed babies to everyone who wanted to peek thru the windows into the nursery, so they could meet lots of people. When someone adopted a baby, I told them to hand the baby to everyone who came into their home, and make sure all family members spent time with the youngster daily. This early start on good socialization is vital in having an emotionally healthy bird. Continuing the process of meeting new people and going new places throughout the bird's life ensures a stable, well rounded birdie.

I hear stories from clients about breeders and pet shops telling people to isolate their new baby from everyone until he's more mature and has established a bond with them first. Birds are capable of forming many bonds, throughout their lives. I handfed Amber from 2 ½ months old, and we have a very close bond - we're "mates"!! But throughout Amber's life I've introduced her to many people and birds, and she goes out "socially" quite often (you'll always see her at the Portland Blues Festival). So when Joseph came into my life almost 2 years ago, Amber readily accepted him, and they now have their own very special bond. Almost anyone can come into my house and step Amber up, or at least pet her. She gets protective at times, but she usually doesn't feel too threatened in most situations by new people (except when she's hormonal!)

What can you do if you already have a one person bird? Try to gradually broaden his world by introducing him to new people and taking him out for rides other than to the vet or groomer. If you have a problem within your own family, have the "disliked" person work with the bird slowly, and preferably away from the cage and from you, in a neutral room. He can start by just sitting by the bird, talking softly and offering treats by hand. Having this person do the feeding and the letting out of the cage can sometimes help. Do not laugh or in any way encourage the bird's negative behavior. Don't "rescue" - if you run to retrieve the bird every time he bites your husband, you're teaching him that husband-biting is the way to get back to you! Play games - pass the bird around the room to each family member, share treats together, or play ball or peekaboo. Try to include the bird in family activities by having the cage or playstand in a central area. Be sure all members interact consistently, and work on building trust. Working with the bird away from home can help as it eliminates territoriality.

Don't let your ego get in the way of your bird's social adjustment. We want our birds to love us as much as we love them, but nothing's sadder than a bird who's whole world only involves the two of you - it's unfair and unkind in the long run, no matter how cute and flattering it seems in the beginning.

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